On February 14th

Cream Pie | Allex Coles | February 10, 2016

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Valentine’s day is fast approaching and I don’t know about you, but I can’t help but get a little nostalgic. It’s that time of year when you pulled out that specific shoe box you’d set aside probably last July to convert into your holiday mailbox, and this process in itself was a task because you had to be sure you picked just the right box that didn’t have edges so pointed that it would cut through the delicate ornament-studded paper suit of said box.

You grabbed a parent, headed to the store, picked out that delicious peanut-free candy (because allergies ruin fun and lives), grabbed a box of SpongeBob or Scooby-Doo inspired V-Day cards and made one out to each of your classmates. You saved the extra big ones for your best friends and drew a microscopic heart in the corner of the card that was to be delivered to this year’s crush (or maybe I was the only kid making such bold moves in first grade).

It was simply the best and certainly the next most significant holiday following Christmas. Blissful childhood memories.

But gone are the days of thin cardboard cards and chalky heart candies with short and very straightforward messages. Gone are the days of Valentine’s day parties and clever games designed around pinning the arrow on the Cupid (or whatever it is your class did). Ever present are the days of my-friends-got-boos-and-I’ve-got-who? Unless you are that friend, and in that case cheers to you. Sincerely. Start considering what clichés just might get your significant other going, or, if you’re lucky, just kick back and let ya boo plan out that evening of unforgettable magic.

But here’s my advice to all of those who fall in the category of the former—and I know you’ve heard this all before, but “treat yourself.” Because what’s better than not buying gaudy, cardiac-inspired trinkets and self-pampering, saving that money to spend on yourself? This is, after all, a holiday truly centered around a prepubescent, usually-naked, cherub-y thing that’s supposed to be representative of St. Valentinius, yes? And that’s kind of weird to celebrate, if you think about it.

Take the day and spend some time with you… or your other single friends because I’m really not suggesting that you hermit yourself away unless you really want to. Forget about your friends sitting at candlelit tables and sharing plates of pasta à la Lady and the Tramp. Stare at your fine self in the mirror and say, “Mkay, we still gon’ have a good day.”

Give yourself a massage. Drink sweet coffee and have some bitter wine, if that’s your poison. Take yourself to dinner and make yourself a gorgeous red velvet cake—or better yet, just make some overly fudgy brownies because let’s just go ahead and indulge all the way. Binge watch your shows, deep condition your hair, give yourself a nice facial. Pamper, pamper, pamper, and then sleep until February 14th is naught but a flicker in your short-term memory bank.

Or you can just do what I do and celebrate St. Roch, instead—the patron saint of dogs.